It was the summer of the new festival.  Ribbons were dancing, the daylight was gleaming, and there was the heat of the sun all around.  Bark lifted his eyes to see the lights as they danced along his iris.  He noticed Mud the Bear across to his right.  Bark turned his head back toward himself.  

“Fuck” Bark thought to himself.  “Why out of all times did he have to come now”

Bark shuffled his way away from Mud hoping that he wouldn’t notice him.  But when he looked back to check, Mud had turned his head right then left to catch Bark shuffling away.  Mud’s face looked puzzled for a second but then his attention turned back to the festival.  In the middle of all these people.  Why did Bark’s embarrassment always have to hit him in the most untimely circumstances.  Bark opened his phone to the Friendcash app that he’d been waiting to use forever.  Here Bark could finally get some use out of it.  Bark entered his request and then pressed the button.  He waited for a response.

“A phone call,” A voice answered from the transceiver. “You wasted 40 units of Friendcash on a phone call,”  

“Ducky.” Bark replied into the receiver. “It’s important.”

“Alright, alright, I was in the middle of my break but I guess I have time to talk.”

“Great” Bark breathed a sigh of relief.

Ducky waved at one of his coworkers and took his phone outside.  

“So what’s the deal”

“A guy I like is here and I don’t know how to respond to the situation.”

“40 units of Friendcash, man you must really like him”

Bark whimpered as he tried to express his feelings over a phone.

“Ok, ok.  Look Bark, just take things slow, definitely don’t rush into it.  That’s not what you want to do in a situation like this.”

“OK”

“Puff out your chest, and gather your confidence.  You are definitely going to talk to him by the end of the day got it.”

“Got it.”

Ducky spoke under his breath.  “It’s beginning to feel like the countless other times you’ve tried”

“DUCKY YOUR NOT HELPING”

“Sorry, sorry, just call me after the festival ok. No friendcash, just to see how things went.”

It seemed that Bark had gathered his confidence except for the fact that he didn’t tell Ducky that he was crushing mad hard.  Had been for quite a while, and it was making everything very difficult.  

 

As Ducky went home from work he wondered how Bark was going to fair with his feelings out of whack.  He wondered if it was a Bear just like Bark was.  Ducky was a 6’5 tall duck so cross species relationships he’d gotten used to but just…  40 units of friendcash.  That was enough Friendcash units to get his girlfriend back.  Calm, collected Ducky laid in bed waiting for his friend to tell him he didn’t go through with it, just for him to have to pick up all the broken pieces that lay around after having your heart crushed.  

 

Mud

 

I still can’t believe that was Bark from back in the day.  Has he gotten bigger since I last saw him.  No couldn’t have.  Maybe that’s just my eyes decieving me.  Ugh, Happens all the time these days.  You never know I could be going blind.  But that’s a little far from the truth.  I came to the festival with no goal in mind but now I just don’t know what to think.  I mean that was just Bark.

 

“Hi”  Bark stood in front of Mud as Mud came out of his thoughts.

“Oh, ugh, uhh hi,  umm Bark”  Mud stumbled on his words.

“How have you been, I mean we haven’t seen each other since like,” Bark started.

“Yeah, yeah, I’ve been pretty good.” Mud answered.  “How are you enjoying the festival.

“...”

“No response, huh”

“No that’s not it, I just, ugh it’s hard to speak.”

“Oh sorry”

“yea”

 

Bark and Mud enjoyed the festival after that.  There was some dull moments, mostly because the festival was a bit unorganized but other than that it was a great day.  :)  Bark could feel his heart exploding with every second they spent together and Mud was certainly ok with the excitement.  

 

Bark called Ducky about the events that happened that day.

 

“Ducky it was incredible” Bark started.

“Wait so you actually talked to him?”

“Yes! I did  :)”

“That was not what I expected, not at all, so how’d it go?”

Bark told Ducky about the booths they played and all the food they ate.

“You sly fox”

“Ducky stahp”

“Guess all you needed was a little confidence boost didn’t you.”

“We’re supposed to go see an orchestra perform one of these days, guess he has tickets.  Can’t remember when though.”

“Ok, ok.  I’m glad to see that everything went good. Keep in touch ok?”

“Yea, yea, I’ll make sure to.”

Off of the phone everything felt surreal for Bark.  It was like crazy how any of this was even happening.  All of my Friendcash huh.  Wow but it was worth it, to get just enough confidence to go up and talk to his crush.  Thanks Ducky, I’ll never forget that.

 

Mud’s life is falling apart and he has a lot of Romantic failures

 

Alone again, lying on the sofa of his living room apartment, watching reruns of his favorite shows.  Isn’t it sad.  How you can take one person, give them the world and have it taken from you?  These nights it really made Mud wonder why he tried at life at all.  A box of cold pizza had made its way to the floor, due to nobody’s fault but his own.  He’d have to get the carpet shampooed because of the people he’d let storm through his house like they owned it.   It was a good thing he hadn’t invited Bark to come over to see his life in shambles like this.  Nothing really remarkable to see.  Nothing really remarkable about himself.

Mud had tried the other night to make some kind of lasting relationship out of what was not.  It was a bull, big strong muscular but the feelings just weren’t there and it just ended being awkward sex.  

Just a year ago he had tried to make it work with a snow leopard named Dawn but they ended up having a huge argument over nothing that ended up with the two of them having to take a break.  Coming back together after that it was really never whole again and they just ended up ending the whole thing.

Mud liked to think of himself as a serial monogamist running from one kind of relationship to the next and lately the whole thing had started to go sour for him.  And all these old feelings were bubbling back up about how he felt about Bark.  He was so kind, and smart, and funny.  Everything he’d been born without.  

 

The day that Bark and Mud go walking through a metropolitan plaza

 

On that bright morning Bark and Mud met up to go walking through the plaza.  They talked about how their lives were going and enjoyed the scenery as they walked.  Mud took a second to add Bark to his friendcash app just to make sure he got him in.  Not that he wouldn’t have time later to add him, there was no rush.  

“It’s so cool that we get to hang out as friends like this” Bark stammered

“Yea, really cool.”  Mud tried to get out in between bites of his hotdog.

“Have you ever had sex cross-species?”

“What, like other than bears?, I mean I guess so, It’s just, I’ve always been in a relationship”  

Bark paused at the statement but he made nothing of it.  Mud had expected a response but he guessed it was going to have to wait, till he questioned it at some time or later.  After he got his ass off of the sofa and put in some hours at an actual job.

 

Mud thinks about the future

 

Mud turned his thoughts back to what happened with Dawn.  How could something so good have gone sour so fast.  I mean she was...his everything.  His waking thoughts, his bednight dreams.  All over a stupid painting.  If he could go back in time he would have just tossed the painting.  It was something that she’d done and he thought it should’ve been hung, but she didn’t want to hang it.  When she first painted it, it was something personal about her dead grandfather, something she couldn’t even express to Mud.  But Mud hung it up anyway thinking things would just get better.  That her grandfather’s passing wouldn’t get to her so much.  When she saw that he’d hung it up in the living room she told him to “Get out” and never come back.  Why Mud had crossed that line, he’d never understand. 

Were these kind of events going to happen again.

Would a relationship be lost.

A bond.

 

Bark on Cloud 9

 

Bark hadn’t realized the smile he’d begun to wear on his face all that time.  I guess it grew on him ever since he’d reconnected with Mud.  The first time they met was back in college where there was too many people to really make any lasting connections with anyone.  It seemed like everyday you were meeting someone new, and that finding a lasting relationship would be impossible.  Bark called Ducky again so he could explain exactly how things were going between the Mud and Bark.  

“I don’t know how to explain it Ducky”  Bark started.

“You don’t know how to explain what Bark” Ducky asked.

“I haven’t felt this way about someone in a long time, and it feels like it starting so fast.”

“Then, you need to slow it down before you get hurt.”

“Yea your right.  Maybe only see each other on weekends, huh?”

“If that’s how it’s gotta be then yeah.”

“You’ve got to stay realistic about the whole thing.  Can’t expect too much from him ok”

“No I genuinely like him.  I want to be in a relationship but its impossible with all of my stupid feelings in the way.  I can’t speak how I want to, I can’t act how I need to.  I’m just so adjlajdfjjflakjosjofja”

“Well”  Ducky let out a laugh, “I’ll just be ajfiajflafjifoij with you then.”

 

Mud

 

Man Bark, sure seems to have his shit together, Mud thought to himself on one of their outings. 

“So this is where you work huh,?  right off the shore” Mud asked visiting Bark at his place of work.

“Yep, Larry’s bait and tackle” Bark replied.  “It’s a great gig”

“Oh, I bet, do you get to do a lot of fishing?”

“Yeah, I mean that’s really the name of the job, to know what lines work with what bait and not like that.”  

“And that’s about the extent that I know about fishing.”  Mud started.  “You’ll have to teach me what’s the use of all the stuff in this store.”

“So I guess that’s what you want, right?”

“What’s what I want?”

“Your place here at the job, taking care of yourself.  You enjoy your independence.”

“I mean yeah but its not all that”

“I guess I was just confused”  Mud started to close in on himself.

“Wait Mud what are you saying?”  Bark asked.

“That your fine on your own.”  Mud retorted frustrated at his own struggles.

Bark tilted his head back to call to the backroom.  “Eddie can you close up shop for me”

“Will do” Eddie answered from the back.”  Bark then stormed off from the shop, leaving Mud in an empty tackleshop.

 

Bark

 

“Ducky i’m an idiot.”

“Don’t think like that”

“To think he ever wanted a relationship with me.  I just feel...so stupid.”

“He probably wasn’t thinking”

“I just had so many hopes with him.  I liked him so much Ducky.”

“I know, I know, and somehow I’m wrapped up in it.”

“I think it’s healthier to just end it”

“-wait, what?”  But the call ended before Ducky could get a response back.

 

Mud

 

Dawn called back in what was now a year and two months to check up on how Mud was doing.  Well -to put it short, it wasn’t good.  They talked about Bark and what it felt like to have a new friend and the bond they’d built.  Bark had suddenly cut off all contact and Mud thought back to all the things he’d said that day.  How he’d word things differently.  I mean how could anybody love him.  He felt like the most sad sack on the planet.  By god even the cold pizza on the floor seemed to be judging him at this point.  But there was no use.  Neither he nor anybody else was going to pick up that cold hawaiin with 2 days of festering up off the carpet.  I mean what did he even say? That your fine?  That Bark was doing fine and Mud somehow wasn’t.  That somehow in between being a total wet sandwich and a clingy bitch, anybody could be better off than Mud.  But that wasn’t what needed to be solved here.  Mud’s own issues with himself would have to wait until things were mended with Bark.  He couldn’t just leave things as they were now.  It was totally his fault to let his internal conflicts come out.  But shouldn’t somebody have to deal with them?  Somebody other than himself. 

 

Suddenly he heard his door knock, and noone ever knocked unless it was bad news.  Always late rent.  Then a voice came out.  “Hey does Mud live here?  I’m Bark’s friend Ducky and I had something to tell you about the day-”  Mud opened the door.  

 

“Your Bark’s friend?”

 

Ducky

 

When I heard that Bark had discontinued his relationship with Mud, I felt like something was off.  I mean they were consistently meeting up.  So Ducky managed to pry the information about where Mud lived by getting him in a drunk stupor and confessing the whole thing.  

 

So that brought him here, right in front of a Bear, trying to confess the feelings of his beloved friend before their entire relationship crumbled.

 

“He thought you were implying that you didn’t want a relationship” started Ducky

“What”, said Mud, “But all I’ve wanted from the beginning WAS a relationship!”

“Well, you sure fucked it up by saying stuff like, ‘Independent’ and ‘Fine by yourself’, like you just wanted to be friends”

“Oh gawd I’m such a fuck up”

“He really likes you Mud.”  Ducky said.

“He does?”

“You’ve got to tell him what’s really going on”

 

Ducky told Mud to spend all of his friendcash on a call to Bark.  It would definitely break the bank if Mud actually used real money to buy friendcash but at this moment of time there was no other choice.

 

Mud

 

Mud spent the rest of what he had to convert into Friendcash and called Bark.

 

Bark answered the phone.  “Mud how did you get enough Friendcash to make a call, that’s like.”

“That’s not important right now, look I have a lot I’ve got to tell you”

“Look I know that I’m worthless anime trash and that you see me as a wash up, but I really enjoy every moment that we’re together, and I haven’t felt that way about someone for a long time.  Sometimes I stare into my living room and say, this is the day, this is the day that I actually do something with my life, but then I do nothing.  And it’s just emptiness.  I really can’t take another day of doing all of this by myself, the nothing.”

“Mud that’s not how I see you at all.  When we first met back in college, I thought you were the cutest guy in the whole world and to me you couldn’t do anything wrong.  I can’t see you as trash, because you aren’t. You just have this way of making everything about you and not seeing everybody around who wants to help you.”

Mud could feel his angst almost stop him in his tracks but he knew he had to get it out, whatever it was that was holding him back from being with Bark.

“Bark I want to be your boyfriend!”  Mud loudly exclaimed.

“...”

“And I want to be there to hold you at night, and I want to be the one to wipe your tears when you get sad, and I want to be the one there when you cry tears of happiness.  I want that to be me”

Bark sobbed and sniffled. “Really” Bark very weakly let out.

“Yes, and I want to be the one to stop you from crying over the phone...Does this mean we’re going out now?”

“Oh, I guess we are huh?”

“Cool, Is it ok if I move in with you, I might miss this months rent” Mud smiled

With tears dripping down his face Bark responded.  “Yes fine, I just never imagined things would turn out like this.”

 

Ducky

 

As it turned out Mud didn’t need to move in with Bark and his landlord let him pay his rent a month late.  There weren’t that many tenants so it wasn’t that big a deal.  Ducky was a little cross at his current situation though.  Bark and Mud spending their Friendcash so freely, on another on top of that, when he needed just 40 units to call his ex.  Ducky ended things because of their different goals but he really wish he hadn’t needed to.  She wanted to go to school in Connecticut and he wanted to stay and keep his job at the factory, and there was just no chance that they were going to do long distance.  But now Ducky was reconsidering his life working at this factory.  Was he going to be living in this same town forever at the same job.  Is that all his life had cut out for him?

 

Mud

 

And so it was their first outing as a couple.  Going to a restaurant, not too nice to be considered fancy, but it was pretty classy.  It was an Olive GuardDog, an Italian eatery, with unlmited soup salad and breadsticks.  After the dinner was over and they were walking back to Mud’s place Bark pointed to a big neon shine shining over the street.  “Hey let’s go hit up this club”  Mud hesitated at first but gave in to Bark’s buzzed demeanor.  

 

Bark 

 

The club was crowded as Bark and Mud entered.  Two ladies approached as they separated the two for a dance.

Mud began a statement, “Actually we’re tog-” but as he looked over at Bark he wasn’t even paying attention to Mud and just nervously gyrating with the lady in front of him.  Mud suddenly tensed up for a moment.  He danced with the lady in front of him without even getting a name and made out with her there too tense to act knowing what would happen.  And the two of them eventually went home to different beds, in bed with different strangers.  The club music was terrible.

 

Mud

 

When finally the day came when they saw each other again Mud started first.

“How could you dance with her like that” 

“...”  Bark was empty and silent.

“And you just went home with her and slept with her.”

 

Segway a part here balances out that that night ends up being unspoken for a while

Bark

 

Bark and Mud didn’t talk at all about that night.  It was left unspoken between them about the events that occurred.  At first Bark was anxious, then the nervousness dissipated a bit when the lady went to go get a drink.  He sensed the future tension that would come from being with this lady, Sapphire was her name.  

 

Mud

 

“You had sex with her”

“I mean you did too”

“You know how that makes me feel!”

“Like what how does it make you feel”  Bark asked cowering in his tears.

“The fact that you had to hide this, U-us, the fact that you had to hide us!”

“Mud It’s not that its-”

“Because that would make us gay right?”

“Mud please don-”

Mud shoved through Bark and left out the door the whole time holding the tears in his eyes so they wouldn’t fall, lest he lose control of the situation.  Lest he lose control of himself.   

 

 The day that Dawn left, left an empty hole in Mud’s life where everything messed up came to light.  His inconsistency with keeping a job.  His lack of social skills.  His inability to take care of himself.  In their relationship, Dawn had become like his other half, and without it he was unable to do anything.  He was unable to wash the dishes because then he’d have to dry them.  He was unable to clean up after himself because then he’d have to admit to himself that he needed help and not just with clean up, with his shambled life.  Maybe he needed a life coach or something.  

 

Bark

 

Bark’s life had not always been so peaches and cream.  He’d battled with major anxiety his entire life to the point where trying to go outside was impossible.  Going out in public, where there’d be people?  No.  And how do you make friends when you can’t even get your point across.  Not a small-talker.  So all of his attempts ended up in failure.  But back in college when Bark first met Mud everything changed.  He’d gone over his note-cards very well and practiced what he was going to say over and over.  So he just went for it, he went up to this random guy with his speech lines prepared and they talked.  At the end of the conversation Mud actually appeared interested, and so they would talk to each other every time they saw each other.  They quickly became friends although they weren’t very close.  They both lived busy lives so it was tough to find time to hangout.

 

At the club Bark had thought that it was his moment.  He’d finally come out of his shell, and it was all thanks to Mud.  He was approached by a lady at the club.

 

“Wanna dance?”  She asked sensually.

“Actually-” 

“What the two of you aren’t gay are you?”  She retorted.  Bark froze he didn’t know what to say.  He didn’t want to suddenly be outed by some random woman he met at a club.  And he definitely wasn’t gay like the flamboyant gays.  He only had feelings for Mud, that didn’t make him gay.  I mean he didn’t like girls in that way but that didn’t make him gay.

“I’m kidding, can’t you take a joke.  I know you aren’t gay.  What are the chances of meeting a gay guy in a club like this”

Bark nervously laughed. “Not very lik-”

“Not very likely am I right.  C’mon don’t leave me hanging let’s dance.”

 

Bark was gay.  At this point this idea scared him shitless.

 

Mud

 

Dawn came back into town and she asked to stay at his apartment.  Only for a night.  Of course he WOULD’VE said no, had Bark not slept with that woman at the club, but right now Mud didn’t care.  Of course she could come over.  

 

When she came in her prius she smelled like the outside world.  She smelled like New York, Los Angeles.  She smelled like she’d done something with her life.  Mud almost reached for his body spray.  They stood motionless staring into each other 2 meters apart.  Then they slowly walked up to each other and kissed face against face.  

In the morning after Mud almost instantly regretted everything.  Dawn in his bed and Bark probably in his own apartment.  Both Mud and Bark contemplating what it meant that they slept with seperate women at that club, and now Mud had slept with Dawn. Ugh.

 

“Wow I feel like shit, do you always feel like this?”  Dawn got up with a slight headache and slightly nauseated.  Some drinking had occurred during the night as well.

“Actually, I’m already in a relationship.”

“Ugh, no.”  Dawn laid back down in the bed frustrated.  “I know you didn’t just get me involved in your mess.”

“You don’t know him, so do your best to be nice when he comes over ok?”  

“He’s coming over?”

“Yep”

“Today?”

“Yep”

“We’re meeting to talk about the constituencies in our relationship ever since he went and slept with another person, well given he was a little drunk.  Buzzed”  Mud was really starting to feel sick.  

 

Bark 

 

Bark knocked on Mud’s door to get an answer.  The door opened and in the doorway stood a woman, a snow leapord.  Bark had heard that snow leapords were pretty reclusive, and they stick mostly to themselves, it was rare to see one in person.  As he stepped in he noticed-

 

“-The apartments all clean”  Bark stammered.

“Yea, is that strange?”

“No, It’s just that Mud never cleans when I come over.”

“Hmm, well that is strange huh Mud?” Dawn asked across the hall to Mud who just came out of the bedroom into the living room area.  

 

Bark stepped into the apartment and closed the door.  

 

“I cleaned because Dawn was coming from out of town to visit.”  Mud answered.  Stood center of the television.

“I think the two of you are sooo cute,”  Dawn exclaimed.

“I slept with Dawn yesterday, Bark.  I just thought you should know.”

“What?!  Right before today?  The day before we’re supposed to figure us out?” Bark cried out.

“Look, after that night where we went to the club, it really got me thinking.  I was so hurt that you slept with another woman not because you couldn’t admit that we were together, but because I need you, and if by chance you fall in love with someone else I couldn’t stand myself, because I’d be without you.  You know in life you don’t get many chances, and your one of those chances for me Bark.  Without you my world is dark, but when we’re together I can actually see the bright side of things.”

 

Bark took a second to digest everything.

 

“You know back in college when we first met I was so nervous because you were the cutest guy in the world and I couldn’t admit to myself that I might be gay.  I’d lived so much of my life living within this straight privilege thing people talk so much about that to try to move outside of it was too much.  And now I want to move forward, because I want us to be together, two guys together, and I wouldn’t deny it ever again, at any other time.”

“What would you guys say to a third member in the relationship.”  Dawn stammered not really sure what Bark and Mud would think of her idea.  

“Dawn,”  Mud went over and hugged her tears streaming down his face.  “You don’t realize how much I’ve missed you while you were gone.”

 

Dawn 

 

Sometimes we don’t realize the people we hurt when we leave them in a certain place.  Their insides completely bare they become perfect prey for the vultures of life and life eats ravenously.  Life eats entrails.  Life eats gizzards.  To us, even in our decaying state we are the perfect meal.  But that’s not considering the countless vultures that she’d met in her life.  They were decent people.  Just maybe some of their eating habits were to be admired.

 

When Dawn asked to be a part of the relationship between Bark and Mud she didn’t know what she was thinking.  She had forgiven Mud for the painting that beautiful painting of her grandfather.  While her grandfather was gone, his spirit would always live on within her, and she knew that.  But there was more about their relationship falling apart that had caused the break-up in the first place.  Dawn hated how messy Mud was, and everytime he’d invite people over he wouldn’t clean up after them, she couldn’t stand it, so she cleaned it herself.  Then there was the anime stuff.  There was more to life than just watching anime and laying on the couch.  Dawn herself thought that applying yourself was a lot more suitable than just waiting for stuff to happen.  

 

But there was something about the bond between Mud and Bark that Dawn wanted to be part of.  They were so for each other.  Bark with his odd quirks and Mud with his hole of an existence.  Maybe together they could be perfect.  Maybe together they could all fill the holes in each other’s lives.  That what she hoped the most.

 

Mud

 

So it was settled.  They were a pack of 3, a threesome.  They decided to have a couple of people over to commemorate their newfound relationship.  There was drinking there was TV going on in the background and then the bachelorette came in and everybody tuned in to watch.  And to Bark and Dawn’s surprise Mud actually cleaned after everyone left which only left room for one thing.  They had a threeway.  Which people at the party were inclined to believe that’s what the relationship entailed but nobody knew it would actually happen.  

 

Ducky 

 

Going to Mud’s house was odd.  Bark and Dawn seemed awfully close after both being involved with Mud.  Wait, were they in a threesome?  No, that would be crazy.  Those kind of relationships never worked out.

​